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Jesus christ..
Sep. 1st, 2006 04:39 amGoddamn.
Since![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
dv_girl started her little bible study posts, I figured I'd try for a "book" of the bible each night.
So I read all of Genesis while in the bath. Goddamn.
Lessons: God doesn't want (or maybe didn't want? who knows) everyone speaking the same langauge. Miscommunication can lead to strife, thus war. Thus god didn't want the people to understand each other, which just leads to trouble.
Lesse, Dan (one of the tribes of Israel) is apparently very serpenty. Go me!
Garden of Eden: Knowledge is bad! The original sin. (Which shouldn't not be confused with the Original Snub. Which requires me to partake of a hotdog bun every friday. Which I don't. Which means i'm a bad Discordian, which REALLY means i'm a good discordian!) Apparently. ALthough now humans are able to tell the difference between Good and Evil. Go us! (Also, Adam and Eve couldn't tell the difference before eating the fruit from the tree of Life, then god comes along and kicks their asses out because of that stupid snake. WTF is up with that? God's being an asshole again)
Oh, and god creates the beasts and meaty things BEFORE he makes adam and eve, but then makes them against out of dust? Whats up with that.
Then there's some long boring thing about Jospeh's brothers selling him into slavery, where he ends up in Egypt, then the Pharoah lets him do a bunch of shit, his brothers find him again during the famine, he gives them food and shit, etcetc. His father dies and thats where the 12 tribes of Israel (Except there was 11, or maybe 13, since Levi were priests)
Ohyeah, and if you jerk off, God kills you!
Tommorow, i'll see if I can get through Exodus, which should be a hoot.
Since
dv_girl started her little bible study posts, I figured I'd try for a "book" of the bible each night.So I read all of Genesis while in the bath. Goddamn.
Lessons: God doesn't want (or maybe didn't want? who knows) everyone speaking the same langauge. Miscommunication can lead to strife, thus war. Thus god didn't want the people to understand each other, which just leads to trouble.
Lesse, Dan (one of the tribes of Israel) is apparently very serpenty. Go me!
Garden of Eden: Knowledge is bad! The original sin. (Which shouldn't not be confused with the Original Snub. Which requires me to partake of a hotdog bun every friday. Which I don't. Which means i'm a bad Discordian, which REALLY means i'm a good discordian!) Apparently. ALthough now humans are able to tell the difference between Good and Evil. Go us! (Also, Adam and Eve couldn't tell the difference before eating the fruit from the tree of Life, then god comes along and kicks their asses out because of that stupid snake. WTF is up with that? God's being an asshole again)
Oh, and god creates the beasts and meaty things BEFORE he makes adam and eve, but then makes them against out of dust? Whats up with that.
Then there's some long boring thing about Jospeh's brothers selling him into slavery, where he ends up in Egypt, then the Pharoah lets him do a bunch of shit, his brothers find him again during the famine, he gives them food and shit, etcetc. His father dies and thats where the 12 tribes of Israel (Except there was 11, or maybe 13, since Levi were priests)
Ohyeah, and if you jerk off, God kills you!
Tommorow, i'll see if I can get through Exodus, which should be a hoot.
